Senioritis Reaches Epidemic Proportions

It's official: Seniors from all over the country have completed their first semester and are coming to grips with the fact that, at this point, it's probably too late to do anything about getting into college.  So why bother doing anything at all?

According to UrbanDictionary.com, senioritis is "an illness that strikes high school seniors; symptoms include procrastination, laziness, excessive absences and tardies, a change in normal attire, pranks and multiple, multiple skip days. The only known cure is graduation."

Yesterday marked the official start of the Senioritis season.  As twilight falls on their high school careers, and our slothful, slovenly, tardy kids are shopping, attending Super Bowl parties and partaking in other activities we got to enjoy as teens. So no parents can move on to freaking out about the following - a sampling from the Neurotic Parent hotline:

1) "I've told my son he can go on a Eurotrip this summer with his friends, but he's too lazy to plan it."

2) "He's received his grades, but put them in his backpack, which he lost at the Wilco concert."

3) "She's been in her room crying because she has decided to end her relationship with her boyfriend now, to spare herself the agony of breaking up right before college."

4) "She's planning a senior project that involves analyzing owl feces and rodent mucus....in our garage."

5) "He has decided to go to Coachella rather than run the bingo game at the Hopi community center."

6) "She applied for a job at Jamba Juice, but showed up carrying a Diet Coke."

7) "His AP History exam came back full of doodles of unicorns."

8) "He has been wearing the same sweatpants for six days."

9) "He was 15 minutes late for his Johns Hopkins interview because he couldn't find two shoes that matched."

and...

10) Senior Moment Senioritis: "Sorry, I don't remember you telling me I had to pick up my sister from dance.  Chill, Mom, she'll be fine in the parking lot by herself."